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Internal Family Systems (IFS) Coach

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madelinegibson.ifs

I’m celebrating 5 years alcohol free today (in c I’m celebrating 5 years alcohol free today (in case you hadn’t realised in my stories 😂 ). I loved starting the day - literally within seconds of waking up, Marcus Rashford style, on a live with @andyramageofficial and @better_life_guy who inspire me to no end in their quests to change the world’s relationship with alcohol. I have been thinking all day about something Matt said - it’s not like you quit drinking and all of a sudden you’re a different person. It’s that you have cleared at least a bit of space to reconnect with the person you were always meant to be, the parts of you and their hopes & dreams that had been pushed to one side, and live the life you were always meant to. For me that’s focusing on living a life of creativity, clarity, calm, curiosity, courage, confidence and connection to myself and others. There’s plenty of other things that can disturb living that way, for example our damn phones and all the other things pulling our attention away from the now, what’s going on inside us, our human needs. Alcohol sent me on a massive & prolonged detour from myself - & letting it go was the start of this incredible journey back. Day to day there’s things that I still notice and appreciate - like waking up without a hangover for sure, enjoying things for what they are not the drink at or after it, greater calm & presence with myself & people & things around me, having more time, & not to mention the massages I have become addicted to instead of drinking. The alcohol free movement has evolved so rapidly in the last five years, the latest wellness trend. So many will discover benefits they never expected from making just ONE decision - without overthinking it, without knowing what will happen, or worrying about whether or not they have the strength or courage to go against the grain of what they or their environments have been like to date. But instead having faith that they’ll figure it out. Trusting themselves completely to go all in with this commitment to connect with the raw & unfiltered version of themselves without the booze. Celebratory speech that nobody asked for: over! I’m here - even if take a while to reply - if u want to chat about going AF
Over the weekend 25 women came together & shared t Over the weekend 25 women came together & shared the experience of yoga, pilates, dance, sound baths, hikes, meditation, music, self discovery workshops - and connection. 

Some of our group came in pairs, many alone - all with courage and curiosity to discover something new

Something new about movement, about healing practices or nature. Something new about themselves, about the power of connection

I am so proud of what @lakecomowellness has become having worked so hard along with my sister @naomi_fahey for the last year on it

A year ago, feeling inspired to create in-person connection after covid, I texted someone I knew that had a little space in the centre of Como that could work as a small studio to teach yoga

I battled with serious procrastination - then eventually sat still for long enough to build a simple @squarespace website 

In-person connection was in progress, & things began to evolve in a way we couldn’t have planned for

☀️ regular yogis were showing up to classes
🌊 clients who were passing through Como or visiting got in touch wanting private classes
🙌 coaching clients online & in-person started reaching out
🫶 amazing teachers and practitioners interested in becoming part of the team got in touch
👫groups of friends to large corporations wanting bespoke retreats (some for 100+ people) were requesting our support
👯‍♀️ experts, coaches and practitioners from all over the world contacted us to collab on world class wellness retreats

And it’s only the beginning for @lakecomowellness 

But for the initial objective 💫 CONNECTION 💫 we have already exceeded all targets and expectations 10 times over 

And luckily, the sky is the limit on that

I have been reflecting on how things could so easily not have worked out this way if fear had been leading rather than an accompaniment along the way

If you’re on the brink of something. If you’ve wanted to get started, but haven’t find the right time. 

💫 Take this as a sign to send the email, set up a website, reach out to someone 💫

Take the first step no matter how small. You never know where it may lead. 

2023 is filling up so reach out to get involved! Or follow @lakecomowellness for news! 👍
This weekend was about all about connection as I h This weekend was about all about connection as I headed to the UK for my first SOLO trip away since my daughter was born almost three years ago. 

So not only was it a time to connect with the amazing crew I shared most of the weekend with, it was also time to reconnect to myself

I always find a lot of clarity when I step out of the day to day, and more so this time during a weekend away from home and family life 

This time round, that’s led me to making a decision NOT to run my group coaching for sober October 

A lot has gone into it before it’s even started, so it was a tough call

But I don’t have the right energy available to give it and the participants what it / they deserve 

I need to keep some more reserves for myself as I already have so much going on in October between @lakecomowellness yoga retreats (few spaces still available 12-16th Oct if you’re interested!) and more super exciting work and friends & family stuff on

I’m still going to be showing up here on Insta throughout October with going sober tips, lives, and AF, as well as more general, IFS coaching content - plus my day to day chatter (woop 😂)

The past weekend away with @andyramageoffical @jillgrams_thehappybalancecoach & the rest of the crew just gave me the perfect reminder of all the things I’ve UNlearnt so far along this alcohol free journey

For example, I used to believe all these things were true:

❌ socializing without alcohol is boring 
❌ “I’m not drunk enough to dance” 💃🏻 😂
❌ “I’ll only jump in to an unknown wild body of water if it’s 2 hours into a booze cruise” 🏊‍♀️ 🫠
❌ I need alcohol to be comfortable to be me even with people I don’t know that well 🥰🤩
❌ exercise is a chore or punishment 🏃🏻‍♀️♥️
❌ life’s too short not to drink 😎👊💫 

For me now life is actually too short TO drink, and the level of authentic & heartfelt connection that went down this weekend said it all. It was a privilege to be a part of it.

Wishing you the best week ahead 🥰

And pls drop me a message and let me know if you’ll be doing Sober October from Saturday 🙌💫
I am super proud to have had my article “I Quit I am super proud to have had my article “I Quit Alcohol and Here’s What Happened” published in @therobora magazine this weekend

If you don’t know, The Robora Magazine is owned by @annieridout , author, journalist and coach and is an invaluable publication full of inspiration and support for women in business 

It means a lot to me to be in the company of @ray_dodd @livethreesixty and of course Annie herself as a contributor to a magazine created especially by and for women.

This magazine is an important step towards further empowering women in business. It’s born from a unique understanding of what it takes to be a woman trying to balance home life and family commitments with finding meaning in our work, sharing our gifts and maximizing our impact in the world 🌎 

I strongly believe that all women deserve to experience their calm, confident and creative selves that can emerge when they take a break from alcohol.

I can’t use enough expletives in outlining my thoughts about the damaging and frankly, insulting “mommy wine culture” and other narratives geared around encouraging women to drink - perhaps one for another post.

You (whatever gender you are) don’t “deserve” a drink. You deserve to experience life with full acceptance of and confidence in who you are without alcohol, the most powerful, whole version of who you are. 

Special thanks to Annie for her support and for commissioning this article. 

I’d love to hear your thoughts or feedback once you’ve read it ♥️ and thanks for sharing it with someone or a group who might be interested 

Follow the link in bio @the.ifs.coach for the full article 

📸 the wonderful human that is @karamariestudios 

#theroboramagazine #annieridout #theguardian #soberliving #sobercurious #mindfuldrinking #alcoholfree #alcoholfreeliving #alcoholfreecoaching #addictionrecovery #themythofnormal #hanxiety #hangover #hangoversunday #sundayblues #sundayscaries #alcohol #howtoquitdrinking #networking #alcoholfreelife #alcoholmemes
Do you keep promising that you’ll drink differen Do you keep promising that you’ll drink differently…until the same thing happens again?

Many people don’t feel like they drink too much, but also don’t like the impact of being hungover on their lives, nor the ➡️ lack of clarity ➡️ struggle to reach goals ➡️ days lost to recovering
➡️ anxiety

So we try all different ways to moderate. My own efforts to do this included:
1️⃣signing up (as a non-runner) for an actual marathon to enforce a period of reduced alcohol consumption
2️⃣drinking water between drinks, or only drinking one thing or the other for its purported hangover-avoiding benefits
3️⃣setting half-hearted intentions to drink less, only to break that promise to myself straight away

Inevitably, the same thing happened. I’d wake up hungover, with a foggy (or blacked out) memory.

The truth is, we can't expect to do the same thing and get a different result.  Sooner or later we call ourselves out for trying to.

I‘d hit my limit when I decided to remove alcohol altogether (for a month) in Jan 2018. I'd had enough of the inner battle, alcohol-induced anxiety, time wasted hungover. I'd seen others who were thriving alcohol-free.

When I called bullshit on myself, true to my all or nothing nature (!), I really decided that enough was enough. And that was the start of the transformation from anxiety and living on autopilot, towards calmness and reconnection to myself. 

The time I’ve spent alcohol-free seems to have escalated as quickly as my drinks used to on a night out. 

I think sometimes, we’ve got to go all in on a new way of being, in order to hit reset and rebuild from there.

When society has taught us to glorify alcohol for the perceived benefits (that promptly disappear), it’s important to be compassionate to ourselves too, when making a hard-stop change like this.

The parts of us that believe we need to drink to socialise, to relax, relieve boredom or loneliness or because ‘we deserve it’ have evolved to protect us in some way. The intention was never to sabotage, even if it feels that way.

If you’re interested in exploring this further with me, follow the link in bio @the.ifs.coach for more on my Sober October group coaching programme.
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